i'm mad at sydney sweeney

profiting off of incel culture is not "empowering"

just a few days ago, it was announced that the euphoria actress sydney sweeney is collaborating with dr. squatch, a male soap company. the product, titled “sydney’s bathwater bliss,” includes a special ingredient: the actress’s actual bathwater — or so they claim.

dr. squatch describes the soap as “a perfect combination of the two best places on the planet: the outdoors and sydney sweeney’s bathtub.” in the promotional video, sweeney is pictured in a bathtub. she says, “hello, you dirty little boys. are you interested in my body … wash? well, you can’t have it. because this isn’t for boys. it’s for men.” (YUCK)

sweeney is a fan-favorite amongst the incel community and is often objectified for her body. i’m guessing that this collaboration is meant to be humorous and ironic, but personally, i just find it disturbing.

when i saw this advertisement, i was thrown into flashbacks of bonnie blue and bhad bhabie, two women who have also profited off of this type of content.

bonnie blue, who wikipedia regards as an “actress” (but who acts more like an internet troll) is known for her onlyfans account where she documented her experience sleeping with 1,000 men in one day. she appears in countless podcasts, feeding into the stereotype that she’s a dumb blonde begging to be used by men.

i did some (brief) research on bonnie because that’s about as much as i could stomach, but i unfortunately stumbled upon a website called incels.is, which is basically what it sounds like. threads about bonnie are flooded with disgusting comments like “vile slut,” “forget about her, she’d never give us a chance,” and “burn her at the stake.” she’s categorized as #toxicfemininity.

this has been regarded as “sex extremism: the bonnie blue and andrew tate phenomenon.” while they argue that bonnie blue is radicalizing women by breaking traditional gender roles and embracing her sexuality, i would argue the exact opposite.

similarly, bhad bhabie, an internet personality who rose to fame in 2016 after appearing on dr. phil, made an onlyfans account just days after her 18th birthday. in the first six hours on the platform, she surpassed $1 million in revenue. she has previously stated that people who subscribed to her onlyfans account when she was just 18 should be in jail, but not before adding “18 is 18 though.” in 2021, it was reported that her earnings surpassed $50 million.

this bothers me because they are complicit in their own dehumanization, which can only be achieved with some form of detachment. maybe they are unaware that incels can turn into violent, hateful men, who will make generalizations about women based on the actions of unattainable celebrities. they don’t realize that they are making the world more dangerous for us, the women who walk on the streets with no security or paparazzi. i don’t care that they are “getting their bag” or “embracing their sexuality” by profiting off of misogyny — they are reinforcing ideas that women are designed for male pleasure. if we allow this to happen under these reasons, we are letting ourselves remain stagnant.

of course, i’m also mad at incels. i feel that goes without saying, especially if you’re familiar with my work. but i have found a reserved rage for women like sydney sweeney, bhad bhabie, and bonnie blue, who are catering themselves to the male gaze without care for the repercussions.

sydney sweeney, i’m mad at you. i expected better. and if you want to continue this reading, please check out sarah’s essay, “my letter to bonnie blue and lily philips.”

Historically, women who embraced their sexuality faced punishment and ostracism. Today, we have an opportunity to move past those biases. However, the content you create does not align with these principles. Instead of empowering people to pursue authentic desires, you reinforce societal expectations and pornographic standards. This is not liberation; it’s a rebranding of old, harmful norms.